News - Veterans
Norman Taylor, Vets Captain 2008
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TEAM SELECTIONS for FORTHCOMING MATCHES
Wednesday 6th August –Hawkhurst - Friendly - Home – 09:00
Norman Taylor & Ian Bridgland, Brian Smith & Brian Piddock, Eddie Chambers & Mike Selling, Gordon Thurstans & John Mansell, Peter Ralph & Clive Bolland, Roger Fuller & Mike Payne
Reserve: Richard Neal
Wednesday 20th August –Etchinghill - Friendly - Home – 09:00
Norman Taylor & Peter Ralph, Tug Wilson & Mike Selling, Gordon Thurstans & Dave Vincent, Graham Jones & Mike Payne, Eddie Chambers & George Slingsby, Brian Smith & John Mansell
Reserves: Roger Fuller, Brian Piddock, Clive Bolland
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Dear Vet Monday 28th July
After spending much of the season at away matches, we are now enjoying a run of home events. I make it 11 in a row, but my maths has never been that great. Be that as it may, on Wednesday, we are playing another home match: our league game against St Augustines, teeing off at 9am. It would be great if we can repeat the excellent win we had last week against Boughton.
The team is: Norman Taylor & Phil Brotherwood, Charlie Mitcham & John Drewett, Gordon Thurstans & George Slingsby, Eddie Chambers & Graham Jones, Roger Fuller & Mike Lyons
Reserves: John Mansell, Mike Selling
As usual, there will be a Wednesday Special competition for those not playing in the match, teeing off from 8am. Brian Smith (vice captain) will organise a challenging event for you and there will be the usual fantastic prize for the winner. Please register early at the Pro Shop so they can arrange tee times.
In the meantime, Charlie Mitcham took some pictures during and after our annual match against the Ladies last week - scores are on the Results page. Here is a selection(blackmail rates on application):
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Happy golfing!
Norman
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Dear Vets Tuesday 16th July
I am currently away all week at a summer camp, teaching English to students from France, Italy, Spain, Israel, Portugal, Georgia and all points west.
And I used to think that communicating with English vets was tough!
Anyway, my thanks to Charlie and Brian for stepping in and doing my job for me. One nice thing about being captain is the excellent support I get.
Thank you all.
I've been keeping an eye on things during my absene and have made the above team elections.
Note that I am panicking about our match against Boughton on Thursday 24th July as, currently, Eddie and I are playing
them on our own! We might need a little help..
Some deaths are under-reported and I think it only right that I bring this sad notice to your notice:
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is
worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost
went unnoticed in 1996.
Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote 'The Hokie Cokey' died peacefully at the
age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the
coffin. They put his left leg in.... And then the trouble started.
Happy golfing!
Norman
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Dear Vet Sunday 29th June
Tomorrow (Monday 30th June) we are playing an away League match against Kent National. This should be fun as they are letting us use their buggies for free! As these are equipped with the latest ‘boy’s toys’ of GPS satellite navigation, we look forward to some excellent play time. However, there is a downside. I understand that the position of each buggy can be seen and monitored from the pro shop. And I was planning to drop into town between holes …
Another intriguing fact is that the clubhouse is up for sale at a mere £2 million pounds. If we like the look of it, we might put in a bid so bring lots of loose change.
On Wednesday, we are playing the Old Peelers at home, teeing off at 9am. As they do not have a course of their own, we call this one the Away match so we must persuade them to buy all the drinks. You may remember that we halved the Home match with them back in May so I look forward to scoring our first Away match win of the season.
As usual, there will be a Wednesday Special competition for those not playing in the match, teeing off from 8am. Please register early at the pro shop so they can arrange things.
We were talking the other day about the best way to repair pitchmarks on the green. The Golf Course Managers Association offer this excellent advice:
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Happy golfing!
Norman
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Dear Vets Monday 23rd June
This Wednesday we are playing at home in a League match against the strongest side in the league – Walmer & Kingsdown. Wish us luck!
Team details are:
Wednesday 25th June – Walmer & Kingsdown – League – Home – 09:00Norman Taylor, Eddie Chambers, Charlie Mitcham, John Drewett, Graham Jones, John Mansell, Gordon Thurstans,
Mike Lyons, Tug Wilson, George Slingsby Reserve: Roger Fuller
Thanks to our growing numbers, we now have as many, or more, players turning up for ‘casual play’ on Wednesdays as are in the matches.
There is therefore a growing demand for something more official on these days. So, from now on, there will be a Wednesday Special on
all days when there is no event in our diary or when there is a match. The Captain will present the winner of an individual competition with
a sleeve of balls as soon as possible afterwards. No prizes for team events, I’m afraid, I can’t afford it!
This Wednesday’s competition will be an 18-hole Stableford but with only nine holes counting towards the result.
Specially-prepared cards will be obtainable from the Pro Shop on the day.
To comply with CONGU requirements, you must enter your name at the Pro Shop before you play and submit your individual card afterwards – no matter how good or bad!
We must also remember that events not in the diary have a lower priority than diary events. Although the Professional and his staff do everything possible to give us a clear run on Wednesdays, we cannot guarantee it and your patience will be appreciated should we not have the course to ourselves.
Happy golfing!
Norman
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Dear Vets Monday16th June
This Wednesday we are playing at home in a Friendly match against Romney Warren. Wherever possible, I’ve kept the same pairings as in the away match to give us the chance of revenge - although we lost the away event only by the narrow margin of 2½ matches to 3½.
Let’s turn that around on Wednesday!
The team selection is:
Wednesday 18th June –Romney Warren – Friendly – Home – 09:00
Norman Taylor & Graham Jones, Brian Smith & John Williams,George Slingsby & John Mansell, Gordon Thurstans & Tug Wilson, EddieChambers & Mike Wells, Charlie Mitcham & Brian Piddock
Reserves: Ian Bridgland, Dave Vincent
As usual, ‘casual play’ tee times are reserved for us starting from 8am for those not playing in the match. There is no official format so this may be a goodtime to play any matches you have outstanding.
The matchplay schedules and current results are on the Diary page of this website.
Tug has e-mailed us all a set of horrific pictures of the remains of an (unsurprisingly deceased) golfer after being struck by lightning
while sheltering under a tree.
This has not yet happened to me but I did have a tree fall on our home
last week (honest guv, I didn’t make it up). Thought you might like to see the evidence:
Happy golfing!
Norman
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Dear Vets Monday 9th June
This Wednesday we are playing away in a League match against Walmer & Kingsdown (see team selection below).
For those not playing in the away match, there will be an Irish Texas Scramble teeing off from 8:45. It’s called ‘Irish’ because you have to use the worst drive off the tee and the worst putt on the green. Further details from John Williams on the day.
After a strong start (winning 5:0 at home against Westgate & Birchington) we have been struggling in the League and are looking for major improvements over the next couple of months. Part of the problem is that too few players enter for the matches and I cannot make a selection based on current form. My own, for example, hasn’t been that great!
So, if you feel that you are enjoying a good run of form, please put your name down for League matches; we need to field the strongest side we can. Anyone who has played in the League will telll you that the matches feel just like Friendlies. Very often, the same players are involved and, win or lose, the same friendly spirit abounds. So don’t hold back, come and join us!
Some current match selections are:
Wednesday 18th June – Romney Warren – Friendly – Home – 09:00
Norman Taylor, Graham Jones, John Mansell, Brian Piddock Charlie Mitcham, John Drewett, Tug Wilson, Gordon Thurstans, Eddie Chambers, Mike Wells, Brian Smith John Williams,
Reserves: George Slingsby, Ian Bridgland, Dave Vincent
Wednesday 25th June – Walmer & Kingsdown – League – Home – 09:00
Norman Taylor, Eddie Chambers, Charlie Mitcham, John Drewett, Graham Jones, John Mansell, Gordon Thurstans, Mike Lyons, Tug Wilson, George Slingsby
Reserves: Roger Fuller
Wednesday 30th June – Kent National – League – Away – 10:00
Norman Taylor, Mike Lyons, Charlie Mitcham, John Drewett, Gordon Thurstans, George Slingsby, Tug Wilson, Mike Payne, Phil Brotherwood, John Mansell
Reserve: Terry Ringer
How are your eyes?
Recently I was playing with a golfer who seemed to have red/green colour blindness, the most common sort. This led me to thinking about how our eyes can get worse as we age and how useful a quick (and free), general check could be. One test is our ability to spot an optical illusion. Are you able to see the one below?
Happy golfing!
Norman
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Monday 2nd June
This Wednesday we are playing the ‘auld enemy’ Tenterden in an away Friendly match. On their website, we are billed as ‘London Beech’ so we need to show that our golf is less wooden than theirs. We are also invited to call in on the ‘hop shop’ but I intend to walk as usual.
I’ve done some tidying-up of these Veterans pages. Competition and Match results are now on the Results page (how logical is that?), while Team Selections are on this News page. Please keep your eyes skinned for changes; we are vets and bits of us get injured or drop off. I will, of course, continue posting selections and availabilities on the notice board.
Below are some forthcoming match selections. Note that we are one short for our League match on 11th June, away against Walmer & Kingsdown. Please give me a ring on 01233 822 132 if you can play. I’m happy to be your chauffeur!
As usual, ‘casual play’ tee times are reserved for us starting from 8am for those not playing in the away match. There is no official format on such days so this may be a good time to play any matches you have outstanding. I’ve not been pressing players so far because our May calendar of events was so full but we do need to move forward now that we are in a quieter period. This also applies to me! The matchplay schedules and current results are on the Diary page.
Please remember to ‘phone Mark Chilcott if you intend to play at home on Wednesday and let him know if you are playing a match or a competition.
Mentioning Mark, I was discussing our lack of match success with him recently. He has agreed to offer us group lessons at only £5 a head if we can produce five or six ‘learners’. This is an excellent opportunity to get expert advice on any aspect of our game we think needs attention. More details to follow.
We’ve had so much rain recently that I began to think the end of the world was nigh. Then I received this confirmatory message:
In the year 2008 the skies were leaden and much rain fell upon the earth. The Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in England, and said:
“Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans.”
He gave Noah the CAD drawings, saying: “You have 6 months to build the Ark before I start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights.”
Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard but no Ark.
“Noah!' He roared, 'I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?'
'Forgive me, Lord,' begged Noah, 'but things have changed. I needed Building Regulations Approval and I've been arguing with the Fire Brigade about the need for a sprinkler system.
My neighbours claim that I should have obtained planning permission for building the Ark in my garden because it is development of the site, even though in my view it is a temporary structure. We had to appeal to the Secretary of State but are still awaiting a decision.
Then the Department of Transport demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.
Getting the wood was another problem. All the decent trees have Tree Preservation Orders on them and we live in a Site of Special Scientific Interest set up in order to protect the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!
When I started gathering the animals, the RSPCA sued me. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodation was too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.
Then the County Council, the Environment Agency and the Rivers Authority ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.
I'm also still trying to resolve a complaint with the Equal Opportunities Commission on how many disabled carpenters I'm supposed to hire for my building team. The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only accredited workers with Ark-building experience.
To make matters worse, Customs and Excise seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species. So, forgive me, Lord, but it will take at least 10 years for me to build this Ark.'
Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, 'You mean you're not going to destroy the world?'
“No,” said the Lord. “The British government beat me to it!
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Team Selection for Friendly Match v Romney Warren
To be played at Home on Wednesday 18th June teeing off at 09:00am
| Norman Taylor & Graham Jones |
| Brian Smith & John Mansell |
| Charlie Mitcham & John Drewett |
| Tug Wilson & Gordon Thurstans |
| Eddie Chambers & Mike Wells |
| John Williams & Brian Piddock |
| Reserves: George Slingsby, Ian Bridgland, Dave Vincent |
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_Team Selection for League Match v Walmer & Kingsdown
To be played at Home on Wednesday 25th June teeing off at 09:00am
| Norman Taylor & Eddie Chambers |
| Charlie Mitcham & John Drewett |
| Graham Jones & John Mansell |
| Gordon Thurstans & Mike Lyons |
| Tug Wilson & George Slingsby |
| Reserve: Roger Fuller |
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Monday 26th May
This Wednesday (28th May) we are playing a Friendly match against Boughton, one of our toughest fixtures. After our League defeat on their home ground we are looking for revenge so wish us luck!
There have been many changes to the team selections for the next few weeks (see below). I keep the changes posted on the Vets noticeboard and here on this website so please keep checking (see below).
For those not in Wednesday’s match, ‘casual play’ tee times are reserved for us starting from 8am so be prepared to go out early. Mark Chilcott reminds us to book these ‘casual play’ tee times in advance so please ‘phone him if you intend to play. You will also need to check with Mark if the casual play can qualify for handicaps. Mark will arrange this whenever there are enough players to make it worthwhile.
How can I get my handicap changed?
After last week’s Stableford Trophy, a group of us were talking about handicaps and the difficulty of keeping ours up to date when we play so many matches. The question also arose about how many handicap competitions must be played in a year to keep one’s handicap current. The official answer is ‘none’ because the English Golf Union has ruled that handicaps will not lapse (see their web site). This is an area where CONGU has delegated to the Union the decision on whether or not to lapse.
This can lead to the situation where some players may feel aggrieved that their handicap does not reflect their current playing ability. Which is why the 2008/2011 CONGU (Council of National Golf Unions) booklet introduces the very useful innovation of Supplementary Scores. Here’s what it says:
Supplementary Scores
The UHS (Unified Handicapping System) is based on the expectation that every player will return a sufficient number of scores to provide reasonable evidence of his current ability. To operate in the intended manner, the UHS requires information i.e. the return of Qualifying Scores to produce handicaps that reasonably reflect current ability.
Although golf club Committees and administrators may consider that in the course of a playing season they organise an adequate number of competitions to provide ample opportunity for Members to participate, investigation has confirmed that a substantial number of Members do not return sufficient scores in the period between Annual Reviews to maintain a handicap that reasonably reflects their current ability. This may in part be due to:
• Work or family commitments preventing participation in competitions
• Difficulty in obtaining an acceptable starting time on competition days in clubs with a large playing membership.
• A declining desire to play regular competitive golf.
Supplementary Scores have been introduced to provide players in the above situations and the like an alternative format in which to submit scores for handicap purposes and augment the often sparse information derived from competition play. The intent is to encourage the provision of more evidence of playing ability over a wider range of players and so make handicapping more equitable and golf under handicap conditions more meaningful for all concerned.
A Member may return a Supplementary Score for handicapping purposes in compliance with the following conditions:
21.1 Shall apply to Handicap Categories 2, 3, 4 and [5].
21.2 In order to qualify for the return of a Supplementary Score a player must have returned only six or fewer Qualifying Scores (excluding Supplementary Scores) in the preceding period between Annual Reviews.
21.3 A Supplementary Score may only be returned at the Home Club of the player.
21.4 An acceptable score for Supplementary Score purposes is any authenticated score over 18 holes under Competition Play Conditions over a Measured Course in compliance with the conditions listed in this clause. The format may be Stroke Play or Stableford.
21.5 Up to a maximum of ten Supplementary Scores may be returned in the period between Annual Reviews.
21.6 Unless the Affiliated Club decides otherwise, a Member is limited to the return of one Supplementary Score per week.
21.7 A player intending to return a Supplementary Score will be required to signify his intention prior to commencement of play in the manner determined by the Affiliated Club.
21.8 A Competition Scratch Score shall not be calculated and adjustments to handicap, in accordance with Clause 20.6, shall be made in respect of the Standard Scratch Score.
21.9 Stroke Play returns shall be subject to Stableford / Nett Double Bogey Adjustment in compliance with Clause 19.
21.10 The Supplementary Score must be recorded in the Player Handicap Record.
21.11 If a player who has registered for a Supplementary Score subsequently does not return a card an increase in handicap of 0.1 shall be applied.
21.12 Returns may be subject to action under Clause 23 (B) if ‘manipulation’ is suspected.
21.13 Players who have recently been allocated a CONGU® Handicap qualify immediately for the return of Supplementary Scores.
In short, tell the Pro Shop before you go out and write Supplementary Score as the name of the COMPETITION on your card. Play with a member with a handicap and observe all the Rules of Golf. Afterwards, Player and Marker sign the card and you must return it to the Pro Shop for entry into the computer.
That’s it!
Happy Golfing!
Norman
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Monday 12th May
Suddenly it’s summer and we are in the thick of things with four matches in eight days – against St. Augustines, Old Peelers, Ashford and Hawkhurst – with only the Old Peelers match being played at home. Now you know what it’s like to be on the Pro tour.
Speaking of summer, I managed to lose five balls during my worst round of the year on Sunday. All were the result of poor distance judgement and club selection. The ball is now running an extra twenty or thirty yards on the fairway so we need to take a couple of clubs less. I didn’t. As some poet remarked, “we live – we never bloody learn”.
For those not in the match against Old Peelers on Wednesday, ‘casual play’ tee times are reserved for us starting from 8am. If you recall, Mark Chilcott asked us to book ‘casual play’ tee times in advance on those days when we have home matches, to avoid potential clashes with golf breaks. Please ‘phone him if you intend to play. You will also need to check with Mark if any casual play can qualify for handicaps. Mark will arrange this whenever there are enough players to make it worthwhile.
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Finally, I like these Laws of Golf my daughter sent me (she doesn’t play golf but she does seem to understand it).
The Laws of Golf
LAW 1: No matter how bad your last shot was, the worst is yet to come. This law does not expire on the 18th hole, since it has the supernatural tendency to extend over the course of a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.
LAW 2: Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your worst round ever. The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.
LAW 3: Brand new golf balls are water-magnetic. Though this cannot be proven in the lab, it is also a known fact that the more expensive the golf ball, the greater its attraction to water.
LAW 4: Golf balls never bounce off of trees back into play. If one does, the tree is breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.
LAW 5: No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all his playing partners must solemnly chant "You looked up," or invoke the wrath of the universe.
LAW 6: The higher a golfer's handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instructor.
LAW 7: Every par-three hole in the world has a secret desire to humiliate golfers. The shorter the hole, the greater its desire.
LAW 8: Topping a 3-iron is the most painful torture known to man.
LAW 9: Oak trees eat golf balls.
LAW 10: Sand is alive. If it isn't, how do you explain the way it works against you?
LAW 11: Golf buggies always run out of juice at the farthest point from the clubhouse.
LAW 12: A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group. Likewise, a group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and an SAS officer -- or some similar combination.
LAW 13: All 3-woods are demon-possessed.
LAW 14: Golf balls from the same "sleeve" tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water (See Law 3:).
LAW 15: A severe slice is a thing of awesome power and beauty.
LAW 16: Translations. "Nice lag" means "lousy putt." Similarly, "bad luck" means “idiot”.
LAW 17: The person you would most hate to lose to will always be the one who beats you.
LAW 18: The last three holes of a round will automatically adjust your score to what it really should be.
LAW 19: Golf should be given up at least twice per month.
LAW 20: All vows taken on a golf course shall be valid only until sunset.
Happy golfing!
Norman
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Monday 5th May
This Wednesday sees the first round of the Bulmers Pairs competition with 52 players taking to the field. It’s great to see so many of us veterans taking part; I trust we will head the results board! If not, we all have three more chances to get to the final: Sunday 15th June, Wednesday 9th July and Sunday 10th August. Tee times for this Wednesday range from 8am to 10am and are listed in full on the Vets noticeboard. The format is BetterBall Stableford, played off ¾ of handicap. Good luck!
Last Wednesday’s April Medal had to be cancelled due to heavy rain. However, a few brave souls ventured out to play a 9-hole Texas Scramble with winter rules through the green and a cavalier approach to rule-keeping. The weather improved as we went round and good scores were recorded. All those who did not play and went home instead were branded wimps unfortunates. You can see the results on the Results page.
The Vice Captain’s team included two Brians which no doubt led to some confusion in their ranks and accounted for their lowly position.
Memo to self: should match team members have different names? It may confuse them but just think of the effect on the opposition.
We are having mixed fortunes in our matches in the new Group 8 of the Society of Kent Golf Veterans (SKGV) having won one and lost one. We are currently lying second to Boughton in the six team competition – you can see the full table of results on the Results page.
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Monday 28th April
I was already feeling like a veteran Veterans Captain until I realised that we’ve only ticked nine calendar events played so far this year and there are still 40 to go. Give me strength …
This Wednesday makes a change from all the team events we’ve been playing recently; it’s an individual Medal so you’re on your own. Not everyone’s favourite format, I know, but take heart. The Sunday before last my playing partner took a 12 on the 1st but went on to - not being last. Which is something, considering he also had two nines on his card. Anyway, it’s a golden opportunity to get 0.1 back or be cut three strokes to a handicap you won’t be able to play to for months. Irresistible prospect , isn’t it?
While you are at the club, please check our notice board for the draw for the Bulmers Pairs on Wednesday 7th May. With 50 players going out, tee times are between 8am and 10am so it’s worth checking when yours is.
In the meantime, we have many matches to look forward to. Below are the selections for some of those upcoming in May, in partnership order.
Look forward to seeing you all this coming Wednesday.
Norman
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Monday 21st April
After the hammering we took last week at Etchinghill (lost 6:0) it’s time for some light relief. And I’ve just the thing: the first of the three events in the Ribald Cup, London Beach’s answer to the Ryder Cup. Played under similar rules to the famous event, ours introduces a number of variations which might improve the attractiveness of the bi-annual tussle between USA and Europe.
Ours is a match between sides representing the Vets Captain and the Vets Vice Captain. Wednesday’s event is the Foulsomes, our version of Foursomes, with the ‘rules’ published on the day - at least ten minutes in advance. The actual sides will be announced on the day with the teams carefully selected to ensure that I win fair play. Whichever team you end up in will be your team for the other two events played in October (Gruesomes and Swindles). There is a magnificent trophy for the winners as well as exciting prizes for players on the winning side (to be given out on Prize Day in December).
At long last, our logo’d clothing has arrived. Thanks for your patience. I will bring it along on Wednesday so remember to bring your payment – cash or cheques only please.
On Thursday we have our second League match (remember, we won the first one 5:0 at home to Westgate & Burchington). Thursday’s match will be tougher as it is against Boughton away, teeing off from 8:30. Please try to arrive by 8am so I don’t get too anxious before play. And remember the old saying about ‘when the going gets tough the tough get going’. Or something.
I’ve now done the team selection for our next Friendly match, against the Weald of Kent on Thursday 1st May at home (see below). We tee off from 9am and there will be the usual lunch afterwards at about 2:30 pm.
Look forward to seeing you all this coming Wednesday.
Norman
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Monday 14th April
The season is now well underway and, after the muddy trials of the past few weeks, the course is looking good and the ball is beginning to run on the fairways (though I do miss my multimat!).
This Wednesday, we have a Friendly match with Etchinghill. The team selection is given above and is also on the club notice board
As reported, we had an excellent start to our League career by winning our first match against Westgate & Burchington 5 -0. We’re unlikely to repeat this fine performance every time – but we will try! As I said in Thursday’s email, the result showed that we can compete well at League level and that the matches are as friendly as the Friendlies. Not surprising, really, you meet many of the same people and we are all united in enjoying the game for its own sake and having a good social day out. If this sounds like you, please put your name down on the big Availability chart on the noticeboard. You will be assured of several matches while the handicap system ensures that you will operate on a level playing field with at least an equal chance of winning (and that other thing).
It’s also interesting to note how often the higher handicaps do well in matches. I think this is because handicaps are a measure of our bad holes rather than our underlying ability. We do very well on our good holes while our partner provides cover on our bad ones. That is how matches are won and it’s why, when possible, I like to pair a lower handicapper with a higher one. However, it also noticeable that certain players ‘dovetail’ well together so I also try to meet your preferences in this respect.
For those not in the match it will be ‘business as usual’ on Wednesday with ‘casual play’ tee times reserved for us in the 9 – 10am slot. Starting in May, we will be able to tee-off from 8am which will please many of us who need to get away early. Mark Chilcott has asked us to book ‘casual play’ tee times in advance on those days when we have home matches, to avoid clashes with golf breaks. You will need to do this individually. I’ve also discussed with Mark the possibility of making our informal Wednesday competitions qualify for handicaps as otherwise there are very few opportunities this season with so many matches on the calendar. Mark will do this whenever there are enough players to make it worthwhile. In the meantime – Happy Golfing!
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Monday 7th April
This Wednesday we are due to play a League match at home to Westgate & Burchington (the team selection is on the notice board as well as below). Let’s pray for good weather.
We had a lovely friendly match away against Romney Warren last week. We did lose, but only by two and a half to three and a half so all credit to those who played. My special thanks to Mike Selling (hcp 28) who carried me (hcp 15) for most of the way while I struggled to find my missing swing. If anybody has seen it lying around, may I please have it back?
Still no news about the delivery of the new logo’d clothing, I’m afraid. The promised ‘ten days delivery’ is now stretched out to a month but I continue to chase the supplier.
If you are not playing in Wednesday's match you can still get a game by turning up early, no later than about 8:15. Hopefully, play for you will start from the second hole, ahead of the match so you do not get held up.
Thanks to Bob French who has done the draw for the Singles & Pairs matchplay competitions which run throughout the season. The draw is on the noticeboard as well as the Diary page of this Veterans section.
Please play your matches before the final date on the draw so that those who do play on time are not inconvenienced. The basic idea is that you first try to agree a mutually-suitable date. If this fails, each side offers the opponents three dates. The Captain and Vice Captain will not arbitrate in the event of any dispute. If the match has still not been played by the due date, the Captain and Vice Captain will toss a coin to decide the ‘winner’. This is an awful way of deciding anything so let’s hope it will never be necessary.
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Monday 31st March
Dear Vets, forget the World Cup, forget the Masters. The real golfing season starts this Wednesday with the first 'Friendly' of the year against Romney Warren at Romney Warren. All those long hours of weightlifting, Canadian arm-wrestling practice and pumping iron are about to pay off. With their golfing games honed to perfection over the winter, the London Beach ‘dream team’ (see above) jets off to Britain’s coast to take on the ‘auld enemy’ again and revenge last year’s narrow defeat. No more ‘pick and place’ anywhere, no more funny rules made up by the Captain once the competition is over, this is the real thing. ‘In defeat unthinkable, in victory unbearable’ will be our proud motto.
I spoke to the Pro at Romney this afternoon and he confirms that electric trolleys will be OK. There has been a buggy ban in operation for the past two days but he expects this to be lifted by Wednesday. Look forward to meeting you all there.
Members not coming with us to Romney can play unofficial golf at London Beach. Just turn up at the usual time and make up your own format and rules. You may well be limited to carrying or pull trolleys only – the course was very muddy on Sunday – but you should get away as long as we do not have much more rain between now and then.
I’m afraid our new logo’ed clothing is still not ready. Latest report is that all items are now available and are being embroidered. As this should only take two or three days, I’m hopeful that we will have everything by next week. Watch this space.
Norman
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NB The 26th of March League Match v Boughton was postponed because of the weather. It will now be played at home on Thursday 24th July.
Monday 24h March
Happy Easter! Anyone still believe in global warming? I played nine holes on Sunday and it was dreadful: snow, sleet, driving wind, muddy underfoot, freezing cold (despite wearing four layers), fingers chilled to the bone – three putted every green. What collective insanity makes us do it?
Whatever, I look forward to golf on Wednesday with hopeful anticipation. Incidentally, I’ve just heard a commentator at the WGC –CA event in Florida say that Luke Donald was unwise to wear all-white in the ‘muddy conditions’ on the Blue Monster at Doral. I’m thinking of sending him a picture of the immaculate Donald alongside my trousers with the caption: That’s not mud – this is mud.
But back to business. We are scheduled to play our first League match against Boughton on Wednesday so let’s hope things improve by then. I think everyone knows if they have been selected to play but, if you’re not sure, see the table above. I plan to do this now for every team selection, as well as the usual posting on the Vets notice board in the clubhouse. I will try to get at least one reserve for each match and will telephone them the minute I know they are needed. So please be on stand-by if you are a reserve!
Because of the doubtful weather, I suggest you bring an electric trolley, pull trolley and carry bag as well as a choice of golf clothing for all four seasons. Also remember that there will be a lunch afterwards so a change into smart casual is required. I hope to bring along the new clothing but don’t count on it – the holiday is likely to bring out the supplier’s excuses.
If you are not playing in the match you can still get a game by turning up early, no later than about 8:15. The general plan is to start ‘alternative’ play from the second hole, ahead of the match so you do not get held up. This won’t always work, sometimes there may be mid-week-break players around, but we will always find a way to get you a game. Currently, starting from the second looks OK this week. Hope to see you on Wednesday!
Norman
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Monday 17th March
Last week’s Captain’s drive-in was a great success – despite the appalling weather. You can see the published results by clicking here or on the Results box above. Many thanks to all those who turned up, I appreciate it. We collected £119.45 for my charity TocH which I’m sure will be used wisely to help children in need.
This Wednesday sees another main diary event – the first Monthly Stableford of the year. So, if you missed out on the prizes last week, here is your chance to add to your trophy cabinet (assuming you still have the room).
I’m giving up weather forecasting for good. My amateur efforts have turned out to be almost as bad as the ‘professionals’ (you know, those dolly birds on TV). All I can say is that the course was almost under water on Sunday and may not be much better on Wednesday. Unless the world ends or, even worse, the course is closed, we will play the March Stableford for the simple reason that the diary is full and the next alternative date is in late October. It may not be a qualifier for handicap purposes but that will be popular in certain quarters!
I look forward to seeing you there.
Norman
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Monday 10th March
This Wednesday sees one of our main diary events – the Captain’s Drive-In followed by an individual Stableford competition.This year we are starting a new tradition so the event might properly be called the Captains’ Putt-out and Drive-in (but we felt that was a bit long). Anyway, the day will start with last year’s Captain, Charlie Mitcham, symbolically putting out on the 18th. I will then drive-off from the first, symbolically introducing ‘my year’. After my partners have played, I will mark my ball position with a stake. Not worked out yet where I will stick it if I end up in the pond.
Memo to self: check stake floating properties, buy anchor.
You will asked to make a contribution to the Captain’s charity, TocH. I suggest £5 or whatever you can afford (the amount of your contribution will be your secret). In return, you will be given your own marker and must try to drive your ball from the 1st to lie as close as possible to mine. As an 18-hole event on a 9-hole course, you will get a second chance from the 10th to improve your position (I promise not to move my marker in the meantime). There will be two prizes for ‘Nearest the Captain’ as well as one for the Longest Drive (on the 2nd) and trophies for the winner, second and third in the Stableford competition.
After the competition, we will sit down to a free ‘feast’ of sandwiches and chips.
Goodness knows what the course will be like after today’s heavy rain but, assuming the conditions are OK, Wednesday’s Stableford competition will qualify for handicap changes. This is in the spirit of the CONGU request that we qualify our competitions whenever possible. I know some players worry about having too many qualifying competitions as they feel CONGU ‘punishes’ good scores with heavy cuts (typically 0.3 for every shot under handicap) while only ‘rewarding’ really poor scores with a 0.1 increase per competition. This can put us at a disadvantage when playing other clubs that are less scrupulous. There is some truth in this. However, if you play enough qualifying competitions over the year, you will probably find your handicap going up rather than down. We will see. In any case, as long as we and all other clubs follow the CONGU recommendations, we should end up competing on equal terms. Let’s hope the weather will be kinder to us than current forecasts suggest.
On a different matter, League matches start soon with our first one being at home to Boughton on Wednesday 26th March. It is extremely pleasing to report that we have more than enough players to field a good team and Brian and I will sit down together next week to make the selection. My approach is to field the strongest possible side, commensurate with ensuring that everyone who wants to play will get several opportunities during the year. Please do not be disappointed if you are not chosen this time, we will be calling on you often!
Finally, I have good news from Ivan Heanley, the League organiser. Buggies are permitted during regular League matches on production of a medical certificate. This currently applies to only one keen member of ours but who knows how long it will be before we all need one?
I look forward to seeing you on Wednesday.
Best regards
Norman
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Monday 3rd March
This Wednesday’s competition will be a Texas Scramble with the teams decided by a ‘fair’ draw on the morning. That’s ‘Vets fair’ rather than ‘real fair’ of course.
The weather forecast remains cold and dry so dress up warm! The fairways and greens should be recovering from the winter so it’s now time to restrict lifting, cleaning and placing to fairways only.
Full instructions for the Scramble are:
Teams: 4 players (teams of three play a different ‘blind man’ on each hole).
Handicap: 1/10 (one tenth) of the combined handicaps of the four players, to one decimal place.
Tees: Of the day (probably yellow)
How to play: All drive from every tee. Best drive is chosen. The player whose ball is chosen marks the position of his ball and takes the first shot. The other players then place their ball on the fairway within six inches of the mark, no nearer the hole. In the rough, the first player marks the ball and plays it as it lies, the other players drop within six inches of the mark, no nearer the hole. Then the best second shot is chosen and, as before, the player whose ball is chosen plays first, others play from the same spot. Play continues until the ball is holed out.
Each team member’s drive - and the blind man’s if there is one - must be used on four holes (yes, it’s going to be tougher this week). Show this on the scorecard by indicating whose drive was used on each hole.
Scoring: On each hole, record the strokes taken to hole out.
Reporting: After play, total up the team score and deduct the calculated handicap (to one decimal place).
Winning: Team recording the fewest strokes wins. The Captain’s decision is final!
Don’t forget to check out the Vets pages on this website regularly. The content is beginning to build up now and will give us a good record of the year. If you have anything you would like to add to the site let me know and, if suitable, I can upload it.
Look forward to seeing you all on Wednesday.
Norman
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Wednesday 27th February pm
This Wednesday’s competition was a Team Stableford with the teams decided by a ‘fair’ draw on the day. With four scores on each hole, the target winning total was somewhere around 125 points. As you can see on the Results page,one team did significantly better by scoring an amazing 148 points.
As I mentioned last week, we intend to follow the CONGU request to make competitions qualify for handicap adjustments whenever possible – even under winter rules – but we cannot do it at the moment while allowing placing anywhere. I hope that we can get back to normal in early March.
Don’t forget to put your name down for any London Beach logo’d clothing you would like to order for the coming match season – see the noticeboard. Apart from being practical and smart golf wear, I notice that a team turning out in ‘uniform’ gets a psychological advantage over its opponents. It makes us look as if we know what we are doing!
Also on the noticeboard are forms for entering the matchplay competitions to be run during the season and for the Captain’s Drive-in on 12th March.
This website is another way in which our proprietor Pierre Edmonds is supporting us and I know we all want to reciprocate. Pierre especially appreciates us playing in his events such as the Bulmers Pairs, Seniors Open and Captain’s Day so I hope we will support him to the full. I know he is already delighted that we have ten pairs entered for the Bulmers Pairs. Let’s keep it up!